Monday, October 03, 2005

I mentioned being a sailboat nut in the previous post. We are all partly nuts to go sailing and own a boat, but you could be a certifiable sailboat nut:

If every time you step outdoors you automatically check for wind speed and direction.

If you wear deck shoes to work, church, school, and out to a nice dinner.

If buying a new mainsail is as exciting to you as dropping a small block V8 into a 68 Camero is to most guys.

If you actually think about crevice corrosion.

If your quest for an iced drink while sailing leads you to spending an unlimited amount of money (and you don’t care).

If you go straight to the Sports section in Borders to check on the latest sailing books they may have.

If you know what Peukert's law is.

If you know the name of Ferenc Mate’s Westsail 32.

If you can pick out any Phil Rhodes design at a glance.

If you find a pleasing comparison between a yacht’s stern and a woman’s bottom.

If you have ever searched the Internet for the breaking strength of 7x19 wire rope.

If you have ever dunked new deck shoes in sea water as soon as possible.

If you think the movie “The perfect Storm” is a comedy.

If you have a natural distrust of anyone working on your boat.

If you long for the past days of tin-based bottom paint and find it puzzling that a 1000-ft long container ship can have tin-based bottom paint and your boat’s 20-something-ft bottom can’t.

If you find life at 20 degrees of heel satisfying instead of disturbing.

If encountering any other sailboat while sailing means the race is on.

If you sail thru your marina just to piss off power boaters.

If someone asks you “how’s the water here?” and you answer “kind of thin on the east bank” and all they wanted to know was how cold it was.

If you can’t help living by amp hours.

On returning from a sail if you spend more time tying her in her slip than washing her down.

If a romantic stroll is walking the docks at a marina.

If the first universal rule for installing anything on deck or down below is “What can I bang my forehead/elbow/knee/shin/toe on?”.

If the second universal rule is “If I turn her upside down and shake, what happens?”.

If you find the green brown patina of weathered bronze beautiful.